Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Just Keep Swimming

I hope this finds you all still excited that you had the best Christmas ever!  If you are anything like me, it's exhausting afterwards, but it's beyond worth it to see the glow in my sweetie's eyes, the anticipation, and the morning the cookies and milk are gone, stockings are filled, and Prancer ate the reindeer food! 

Taking down Christmas decorations was much easier than putting them up!  My house is Christmas free and I have to admit that I'm completely ready to see the great things God has in store for us in 2012!  Bring on the New Year, new beginnings, and memories that last a lifetime!  Yes, I'm excited!

"There is deceit in the hearts of those who plot evil, but joy for those who promote peace."  Proverbs 12:20

I know that Christmas is usually rush, rush, rush.  Buying all the perfect toys, food, visiting a bazillion places, etc.  My little family was shuffled around quite a bit.  Christmas Eve dinner was wonderful, but Santa got tired!  After my sweeties and I sat out cookies and milk for Santa as well as reindeer food on the lawn, they were in bed by 9 p.m.  which is past bedtime, but this mommy slacks off on schedules and rules when it's time to have fun!  I made the biggest pot of coffee ever (added some espresso), bundled up in the cold and went to the storage building to bring in all of Santa's presents.  I laid down at 2 a.m. after the two piles were arranged in such a way that it looked like Santa brought tons of presents!  My seven year old was up at 5 a.m!

He climbed into my bed and informed me with such excitement that Santa had been here.  I was unable to ask him to get back in his bed, I mean it's CHRISTMAS!  I just mumbled in my happiest mommy voice "Honey, we have to wait until your brother wakes up.  Go back to sleep with mommy and we will see what Santa has brought soon.  I can't believe he's been here!" 

We were up and at it at 6 a.m. opening toys and lots of screaming was going on.  It was the best sight in the world.  Our first Christmas with just the sweeties and I.  I'll go ahead and admit I had to phone for help to assemble some of the toys.  I apologize, but I know ZERO about a nerf gun with a "safety & a clip."  Someone so sweet came to the rescue and all toys were assembled! 

I dressed the boys differently than normal.  I'm so proud to admit that!  They had Christmas outfits, but I put on the baby's Christmas outfit (not the perfect one, but the one that is just okay with a little Christmas flair), and I dressed my oldest in regular clothes and a red shirt (this year I wasn't worried about having the perfect Christmas photos and I can't explain to you how much I love that change in me).  Being a single mom for me has required letting go of lots of the things that used to matter so much to me.  I'm realizing it doesn't matter and I'm letting it go.  Thanks be to God!  I've tried for seven years to be supermom, but I fail miserably.  However, I'm the best mom I can be, and I'm content with that.  My nature is that of a perfectionist, but it's impossible to do all of the things that perfection entails when you have two little sweet peas and I'm realizing it's not worth it.  My time with them can't be replaced and I value every second.

I'm so excited to start 2012!  God has brought some amazing people into my life and I'm so thankful for that.  I don't deserve any of it, but I've asked God awhile ago to bring in those who really care about me during these times when I'm not as strong as I can be.  He's done that!  I truly believe he knows just what we need and sends that exactly when we need it.  That's how it works for me.  God never really speaks to me, but I am certain he speaks to me through others and I know he answers prayers and hears all of them.

2012 is going to be THE year of great things!  I'm bound and determined (so watch out world!) to make it the BEST year ever!  It symbolizes new beginnings for me and I can NOT wait! 

I hope you all are rested from all of the Christmas and that you were able to enjoy your families, friends, spouses, kids, etc.  Today I received a text from a dear friend asking how I was doing and I quoted a line from Dory in "Finding Nemo."  I told her "Just keep swimming." 

"You give me strength and guide me right.  You make my feet run as fast as those of a deer and you help me stand on the mountains."  Psalm 18:32-33

Even if you think everything is falling apart, you have stress at work, trouble at home with a spouse or child, you are lonely, depressed, heartbroken, or even if you are fantastic (which I hope you all are), Just keep swimming dear friends!  I promise you it's worth it.  If I can do it, a monkey could do it with his eyes blindfolded walking backwards.  You are all so dear to me, and I wish the best for you all.  Get excited about 2012!  I am! 

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

A reason, not just a season

Good evening sweet friends and readers.  I hope this finds you all more excited than ever for Christmas Vacation, spending time with those you love the most, and mainly thankful for all the wonderful blessings in your life.  I'm blessed and I never lose sight of that. 

Yesterday I had to visit my family physician for a check up.  He looked at me and asked me "Do you eat, Robin?"  OUCH.  I replied in my best, most happiest voice, "Yes, I eat, Why do you ask?"  He said I look unhealthy and am underweight.  He also informed me it's not normal to feel a valley when laying down between my hip bone and my ribs.  I'm trying and that's what I told him.  He knows about the divorce, my sick relative, career change, baby leaving throughout Christmas break, etc.  He gave me his best sermon and I give him a four out of five stars!  Yes, I'm being sarcastic, but you have to understand that when things are a wreck the last thing on my mind is eating.  I'm definitely NOT an emotional eater.  Food does not bring me comfort, and throughout the course of  the past year I've gone from a size six to a zero or a two with a belt.  I am trying, and that's all I can do.  He also informed me that I'd have to be careful because he says I'm beautiful and that men are going to flock to me.  That was nice of him to say especially after the unhealthy weight sermon.  My blood pressure was unusally higher than normal (by the way I take blood pressure meds and have for the past year and I'm only THIRTY).  He doubled the dose because this mommy isn't willing to have a stroke, heart attack, or even have the slightest damage to my heart. I can NOT imagine why my blood is almost boiling!  Either way, I take the maintenance pill at night and I'll be just fine as always! Bless his heart and thank God there are still doctors out there who care about my well being.  I'm honestly thankful to have a wonderful doctor.

Last night my seventeen month old sweetie got sick on me.  I consoled him, prepared to clean up the vomit, and he was fine playing and laughing.  I, on the other hand had a weak moment and had to hold the porcelain king for a few minutes while he thought it would be the prime time to mimic me gagging and getting sick.  I have no idea what happened to my stomach!  I worked in oral surgery for years, but perio disease, decay, and vomit all smell a little different and last night it wasn't meant for me to hold down my special k bar.  But hey, I wasn't prepared to give my "mother of the year" speech anyway (please note my intended sarcasm).  We are all fine, but I thought you might need a little laugh! 

Today was one of the toughest.  I've prepared myself as much as possible to be away from my sweet baby for a week.  SEVEN days!  That's the longest I've ever been without him, but I'm sure I can do it with God by my side.  I know it's going to be tough, but the great news is I have THE MOST amazing friends & family anyone could ever ask for.  I'm so grateful and blessed and I don't deserve it.

Today was my last day in my current position and saying goodbye is never easy.  However, I'm so thankful that I have such amazing people in my life that make saying goodbye so hard.  I didn't say goodbye.  I said "I'll see you all soon," and I will.  I will train the next person to do my previous job.  In the meantime, I'm going to take a break to the best of my ability and take a couple of weeks to take care of my sweet babies and myself.  Next week was supposed to entail a big and nasty court date called "mediation."  I was prepared as I could be, only to find out that my former husband cancelled at the last minute.  I'm beyond ready for this crazy ride to be over. 

After I finished packing my family photos, children's art work, and all my other cute stuff from my desk, I turned in my keys and bolted to the family doctor appointment concerning my closest relative.  The doctor basically told us that my relative could die at any given moment in their sleep due to carbon monoxide poisoning.  The rate of carbon monoxide in their blood was 22x that of a normal person and extremely lethal.  The doctor told us that he called us in because he wanted us to know before he got a call that my relative was found dead in their sleep.  I can't begin to tell you what a hard pill that was to swallow.  I had to put on my bravest face & be a shoulder for her to cry on.  I cried my eyes out later.  The great news is, if she quits smoking, her carbon monoxide rate will go down rapidly.  She has quit smoking and those in my family who were smokers have quit with her.  It's so hard to hear her saying she wished she were in heaven (and she means it) where she wouldn't have any worries, anxiety, or stress.  She knows she wouldn't feel pain there, but again I'm selfish and not afraid to admit it.

The amazing news is that God is still in the miracle business and she doesn't have cancer, but she's seriously ill.  I'm so thankful to be able to spend this Christmas right beside her.  I'm glad I can be there for her to listen to her fears, worries, and other problems.  I can't imagine what she's going through, but it hurts my heart something awful to sit back and watch it happen.  I literally spend every free moment I have with her.  I want to memorize her face, take unlimited photos, tell her how much I love her every chance I get, and memorize her voice. 

I know God has HUGE plans for us all, and I have an undying faith.  I know that things are going to be okay and good will come from all situations one day.  I have an interview tomorrow, my best friend in the world is flying in from down south to spend Christmas here and will be moving at the end of January.  You see, God knows exactly what we need and I believe he gives it to us when we need it.  I try my best not to ask for anything and to tell him how thankful I am for what I have. 

Recently, he's sent people in my life for a reason and not just a season.  I know those special people came from God because I'm extremely honest with him and I've told him that if he wants me to go to these doctor appointments and court dates he's going to have to do it through me and send me those who care about me most or new people in my life to help me through this crazy ride called life.  He has done that and I can't thank him enough.  Thank you for all of those special people in my life that never give up on me.  You all know exactly who you are, and you have no idea how much I love each and every one of you!  I know God has sent you for a reason and not just a season.  I couldn't do it without you all and I promise I can lend my heart, help, ears, and anything you all may need at anytime.  Thank you all for bearing with me, believing in me when I didn't believe in myself, and for remaining constant.  Words can't express and I love you doesn't cut it, but I hope you get the picture.

Tomorrow is a new day and I'm excited to start over!  Christmas shopping with an amazing person and a new job interview is quite exciting.  Did I mention my oldest son's Christmas break begins tomorrow and my youngest son's last day of school is tomorrow?  I'm elated!  My seven year old came home today on top of the world to have the privilege of being trusted to take care of the princess, the class guinea pig for Christmas vacation.  I can't say I'm so excited, but the boys LOVE LOVE LOVE princess and I'm just a little terrified about the sweetest rodent.  However, they are in love with the rodent, so I will try to overcome my fear of miss princess biting my sweet babies or myself. 

I want you all to know that I adore each and every one of you!  I hope you all are reading this for a reason and not just a season.  I promise you all that life is great!  It may have it's ups and downs, but if it didnt' then we wouldn't be as strong as we are would we?  I'm going to enjoy my little family this Christmas and make it the best one ever!  I pray that you all do the same and that God will ease any heartache you may have, struggles you may be going through, and enhance the joy of Christmas in your hearts and actions.  Please hug and kiss all of those who are dear to your heart and tell them how much you care.  I did today.  I will tomorrow, and I will continue as long as I'm alive.  God bless you all and have a MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Sunday, December 18, 2011

The Season of Giving

First, life has kept this mommy super duper busy lately and I haven't written in awhile.  I hope you all are doing wonderful and ready for Christmas!  We have a countdown going on at our house so I'm certain that there are only seven days left until Christmas.  No pressure, just pure excitement in my house!  It's the season of giving!

I'm as prepared for the work week as can be.  If work were the only thing that I had to face this week, I'd be sitting with my hands folded behind my back (actually I wouldn't, but that's how I picture someone who is completely relaxed without a care in the world). 

This week will be my last week in my current career.  After much prayer, thought, tears, smiles, and more prayer, I've decided to resign.  Mid-prayer (this prayer was solely about my current career), my phone rang and the caller at the other end of the line wanted me to interview for their company.  I know that God was answering my prayer.  I know that I've made a hard & tough decision, but I also know I've made the right choice.  I'm certain that God has big plans for this busy mommy and I'm more than willing to follow him and so eager to see what he wants for me.  It's a huge step of faith, but I'm ready.

I'm as prepared as it gets when it comes to dealing with life changing events.  This week my close relatives doctor has called in the family to meet with him on Wednesday.  I've watched my dearest relative hurt, cry, and suffer and am more than ready to be whatever she may need during this time of sickness.  To say it hurts me to watch this process is an understatement.  I know that God has big plans for us all, and I can't wait to see what he has in store for her. 

I also received a letter in the mail and it appears that the court process is rolling right along.  I'm afraid of court, as I've not been much in my life, but I'm beyond ready to be divorced so that I can close that chapter in my life, as I have already begun to do a long time ago. 

I'm the only elf this year, so I've done lots and lots of wrapping gifts, making candy, hanging stockings, and so on.  I'm slightly worn out, but I know the glow that I hope to see on my sweeties' faces on Christmas morning always makes it worth it.  They come first to me and there isn't much I wouldn't do to make sure they have the best life ever!  I'm so glad to be able to tell you that I was able to take them to a live nativity scene and teach them the real meaning of Christmas.  I'm not sure if you all have experienced the selfishness involved in Christmas or not, but we have.  I know my babies needed a little insight for the true meaning of the season.  I guess my Thanksgiving life lessons didn't encourage world peace or a new inspiration for mission trips overseas! 

I also know that I'm dealing with a seven year old and a seventeen month old.  I also took my nephew who is five.  I'm sure it doesn't matter as much to them as it does to me that we emphasize the meaning of Christmas.  I'm not raising little grinches even if his heart DID grow fifteen times larger!  I was blessed to be able to walk them through the live nativity and tell them the historical and biblical background of Christmas.  I was disappointed that the highlight of the trip was the live camel!  What was I thinking?  The camel WAS super cool, but for some reason I was expecting a reaction a little different. I got statements like "Aunt Wobin, that wasn't the REAL Jesus and you said this is exactly like where he was born, & "Why didn't them have stockings?"  I know God knows my heart and I also know he understands that children are children.  I'm trying my darndest and I'm just proud that I have read the Christmas story to them all and done my best so that we can celebrate Jesus' birthday!

 Next year we will pick an angel off of an angel tree and we will wrap presents for children in need.  I recently visited a prison filled with women.  The mission work was called "The Christmas Carnival," and I'm so blessed and changed just from the experience.  I have a list of felons beside my bed that I pray for daily.  I was more than honored to take weeping prisoners (in a maximum security facility) and pray over them.  I cried like a baby!  I couldn't believe these women were thanking me for praying for them.  We delivered the simple things in life such as chapstick and shampoo to them for free.  These are items that normally they would have to pay for.  I heard the same underlying factor from each convict that I prayed with.  They all were sad to say the least that Christmas was coming and they were in prison.  They don't have joy or hope.  I prayed all day and asked God to speak through me.  I prayed for most of the women, as they didn't feel comfortable praying. 

God worked in me that day as he usually does if I will let him, and these women don't know it, but they also ministered to me.  I didn't talk about me.  It's not about me.  It's about others.  That's the way I am and the way I'll stay.  However, I know how it feels to be approaching a Christmas that won't be the same.  I can't imagine what they are going through, but you all know I can relate.  I'm sure I'm praying and all shaken over murders and drug dealers, but in God's eyes if we are his children then we are forgiven if we've asked for forgiveness and one sin is no greater than another.  I'm beyond thankful and grateful that I had the chance to spend the day in prison. 

I'm ready for my sweet babies to be out of school and for Christmas break to begin!  I'm not so ready for the swapping of children during the happiest time of year.  I'm sure it will be tough, but I know I'm stronger after each and every day that passes.  I hope you all have joy and hope this year.  I have both and that's because I have faith.  I'd be lying if I told you that this was going to be the best most perfect Christmas ever.  It's not going to be.  It's going to be the hardest thus far, but I have pink boxing gloves (from kickboxing classes) and I'm prepared. 

We all have so much to be thankful for and I am very content.  I don't want anything.  I don't need anything.  I have everything because I have a loving God who is always with me and I have the sweetest babies ever.  I'm blessed.  Life is good. 

I hope you all have a restful week even if you are cooking and still shopping like crazy!  I hope you all feel that joy, encouragement, and excitement that I prayed the prisoners felt.  If you are missing loved ones this holiday season, I'm so sorry.  I know it hurts.  I know it's not the same.  I also know that God wants us to be happy and lots of sweet angels are smiling down from heaven rejoicing!

Crank up the Christmas music, dance, sing, and do whatever it is that gets you excited!  I know you all are strong people and can do anything  Please be encouraged this Christmas!  I want you all to have the best Christmas ever and I hope you all make memories that you will never forget.  I adore you all and am blessed to have such wonderful & amazing readers.  Merry Christmas from this mommy to you!

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Precious diamonds

Today is a new day and for that I'm blessed.  I'm blessed for so many reasons, but that could take a ton of paragraphs, so I'll spare you.  I know we are all blessed.  We just have to open our eyes and see those blessings.

One of my blessings from God is a close relative of mine who has reversed roles on me.This relative is not only a precious diamond, but a flawless fifteen carat diamond in my eyes.  I'm now the adult, and my relative is the child.  This is THE relative that I'm closest to, and the truth is I'm selfish.  I can not lose this relative to illness or anything else.  Not now.  They may be ready to go to heaven, but I'm not ready for them to go.  Selfish, huh? 

Then they heard a loud voice from heaven saying to them, "Come up here." And they went up to heaven in a cloud, while their enemies looked on. Revelation 11:12

It's extremely hard for me to be the adult and hear and see the tears stream down their face.  It's almost more than I can bare.  However, if I had it my way, I'd spend at least three hours a day with my closest relative.  I've done the doctor route and spoken with way too many and had every test run that's known to man.  Either way, my family member's health is far from fine and is continuining to go down hill.

After a successful meeting, I heard my relative on the phone with me and fought back the tears.  I ran to drop off something and locked my keys in my car!  Really???  Right NOW??  So, I was ten minutes from deadline to pick up my youngest son from daycare.  Think fast!  I knew I could physically run the two miles but, I also knew my sweet baby wouldn't hold up for the two mile run back to where our car was locked! 

God was watching and probably laughing, but one of the most amazing women ever loaned me her Durango.  It's a LARGE SUV, I drive a four door car.  A mom car!  I first turned on the windshield wipers, figured out it wasn't a stick shift, and bolted to pick up my child.  Next issue was no car seat.  Man!  Too bad, mine is safely locked away in my car two miles away.  Mommy instinct kicked in as soon as I realized I had ten minutes to pull it off.  I did all I knew to do (it was just me so I had no extra set of hands to hold and restrain my toddler for the short ride back) and strapped him in a "big boy" booster seat and proceeded to drive.  Along the way we passed a police officer.  I would've waved, but I had one hand on the wheel, and one hand on my baby.  GREAT NEWS!!! We made it!  We are safe and still blessed.  Where there's a will there is a way, and you bet I have a will!   I know most of you have been in similar situations and can relate to reacting calmly when things go BERZERK!  I was just trying to pick up my toddler and rush to hold my close relative.

Tomorrow is another meeting that probably won't be so plesant, but I can do it!  I'm pretty tough when I have to be.  Otherwise, I don't have a tough bone in my body, although I still have some killer biceps going on from lifting my toddler! 

Tonight I'm hoping we get some sleep in our house.  My boys don't understand that mommy has to have adequate sleep in order to be on top of my game at these meetings and at work.  Sammy returned to his home tonight and my seven year old was so mad and sad.  I've said it once, but I'll remind you.  With this mommy, rules are rules.  Period.  Sammy was supposed to help my oldest to sleep ALL night in his own bed.  Before you start thinking I'm so hard on my sweeties, just know that I gave him TWO chances.  Guess what?  He's sound asleep in his bed!  Something I'm doing must be working!

I hope you have all had a calm and blessed day!  I hope if you have children that they are just as excited as my boys & I are that CHRISTmas is coming!  We can't wait!  Yes, it will be probably be the hardest holiday I've ever experienced, but I made it through Thanksgiving and gave thanks.  I know I can do this because God will be with me.  Have a wonderful day tomorrow! 

Please do me a favor and tell those you love the most how much you care about them.  Friends, family, co-workers, church members, whatever the relationship is, please tell them.  It can all be taken from us in an instant. Those are your precious diamonds!

And you must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength. Deuteronomy 6:5

 I know I've made it habit to tell those I love that I love them.  I only live once and I want them to know that I love them.  I love all of you and have so much faith in each and every one of you!  I believe in you.  I think you are wonderful.  God also loves you more than I can imagine.  Have a wonderful evening, sweet friends!

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Rumor Has It

Today was another amazing day!  Aren't they all if we wake up in the mornings?  Today was a blessed one, but I have to tell you I didn't start off my day with that attitude.  Our normal little schedule was adjusted as last night was my seven year old's cat, Sammy's first night to stay with us (to help him sleep in his bed).  Litter box on the deck of course because this mommy doesn't like cats.  I will tolerate and be nice and sweet to little Sammy because my boys adore him!

Last night Sammy and my oldest went to bed, said our prayers together, and I didn't hear a peep until ten p.m.  I told my son to go get back in his bed because Sammy might be scared without him.  It was all I could come up with at ten p.m! 

I woke up this morning with a cat's rear on my chest and my oldest son snuggled up closer than ever to me!  Ahhhhhh!   Don't get me wrong, I LOVE to snuggle, but there was not a centimeter between my son and I!  Other thing is, I like Sammy but I do NOT like a cat's rear on me, or in my bed!  You get the picture.

Today I found out that I'm the headliner for two rumors floating around a small town with a large amount of gossip and rumors.  Rumors aren't true.  Rumors hurt.  I don't participate in gossip.  I'm not a fan.  Never will be.  I cried like a baby after work on the drive to pick up my youngest son from daycare.  I vented to a friend like a tough girl, but the tough girl cried because rumors and gossip hurt me so much today.  It wouldn't have hurt had they been true, but they aren't.  It might be different if it was something small like I don't buy groceries, or I have a personal assistant.  It was BIG, FAT, UGLY, DOWNRIGHT MEAN, & NASTY lies and there were two of them.  Tis' the reason I don't participate in gossip or rumors.  They hurt and believe it or not, most people have feelings deep down or they may wear them on their sleeves. 

His mouth is filled with cursing and deceit and oppression; under his tongue are mischief and iniquity Psalm 10:7

I considered going to a level I'm against, which is lowering myself to the level of those involved in the gossip and rumors.  I considered resigning from my current position and taking a normal job that allows you to leave your work at work and doesn't involve constant phone calls and emails.  Even though I have work hours, they are not followed by all those involved in the company.  I decided to pray about it and I honestly sat at my desk in silence all day (I love music so music is always playing unless someone is in my office or I'm on the phone) and prayed to God.  Mid-prayer regarding what decisions to make and actions to take, my cell/work/home phone rang.  Interesting that the other person on the line scheduled me an interview this week.  This may not be the answer, but I don't know how much more direct God could have gotten.  It's time to make some boundaries for my company.  You see, I'm a "people person," and former "people pleaser."  I bend over backwards to help everyone out if I can.  I even do it if I don't have time.  It's becoming too much for twenty hours a week.  I'm spending more time than that on my job, and I can't charge the company for more hours nor would I.  I just work like a woman on a mission and thank God for my days off!

Tonight I went to listen to a woman named Jamie Rafferty speak at church during a women's meeting.  It was a hurdle to get there.  My toddler went to make up missed visitation with his father, and my oldest stayed with my sister.  I was late & my sister was kind enough to pick up my baby from the designated meeting place.  I was blessed to have found babysitters and a willing dad that wanted to make up his missed visitation and to also get to hear another Christian speak.  I was also elated to see friends and acquaintances there who I know don't attend church.  That warmed my heart and I hope God spoke to all who attended through the speaker.

The whole way home I continued to talk with God about the gossip.  It's extremely bothersome and effecting my reputation, because I'm sure certain people in the small town that I live in actually believe the lies.  I got nothing back.  I'll keep praying and waiting.  I don't react instantly or on impulse anymore and am thrilled to be able to tell you that!  I wait on God.  I'm impatient, so it's hard, but that's what I do. 

THE BEST part of the whole year was tonight!  As I was tucking my seven year old in bed (and Sammy the cat), we said our nightly prayers together.  I always pray with him then say my own prayer before I go to bed.  Tonight after his prayers were said we began talking.  He wanted to pray that his father would call us sometime.  I fought back the tears.  He then asked me what a Christian was.  I was so happy to tell him.  He then asked me how to become a Christian!  OH. MY. GOSH. 

I lead my son to Christ tonight and cried like a baby again tonight because I'm so happy.  I immediately called my grandfather who happens to be the best, most knowledgeable Christian man I know that I'm related to.  He was sleeping but my grandmother woke him up when I told her why I was calling.  I cried to him worried I had done it the wrong way.  He reassured me that I had done it just like he would have done it.  I'm sure he'd have done it much better, but hey my seven year old is going to heaven!!   I then called my preacher and left a message to see what we need to do next and to double check that I've lead my son to Christ and salvation the correct way.  My son was in his bed and I was on my knees beside his bed. 

For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16

I'm so blessed!  I hope you all are having a wonderful week thus far and I also hope and pray that you all are never the headliner of a false rumor that turns into gossip.  I also hope and pray that you all don't partake in gossip or start rumors.  It hurts.  I promise.  Have the best week ever, sweet friends.  I'm so proud of you all and I think you are all the most amazing people in the world!  I think you are all doing magnificent jobs at everything you do!  Dear friends & readers please have hope, faith, and be encouraged.  Keep your pretty or handsome heads up, smile and keep on being the shining stars you all are in my eyes.  God bless you all!

Monday, December 5, 2011

Opportunity Knocks

The beginning of the month means many things to this mommy.  It means different things depending on the month.  This month it entails two work events approaching in the next two weeks (no pressure at all), Christmas parties, the beginning of winter, child support if we are blessed, and the best part is CHRISTMAS VACAY!!!  I can't wait for the boys to be out of school for a couple of weeks!

Normally, it would have meant running around like a mad woman to make sure my sweeties had everything (or close to) that they had asked for from Santa.  This year, I took one day and four hours and headed to Toys-R-US on a mission! My youngest (the sixteen month old) was SUPER easy!  I went to the characters he liked, checked age, looked for some educational toys, and put it in the cart!  

I had help from my oldest.  My seven year old took a sharpie and boldly circled everything he "could not live without." How easy is that? The only problem was, I second guess myself.  I had a budget partnered with coupons and I've explained to you all how I feel guilty for raising them in a broken home, the lack of involvement with dad, and so on.  Therefore, I spent too much, got EVERYTHING on the list out of guilt.  I know better.  It just seemed like the thing to do and I still don't regret it. 

I've told him that Santa sends mommy a bill so I could indirectly teach him a "life lesson" about how not many things in life being free and how we don't always get everything we want, but we get what we need.  Before your mind starts racing, no I didn't buy my sweet boys socks or underwear!  I DID buy them some candy that reads "A lump of Coal," for their stockings.

Recently, my seven year old decided to make it a habit for the past four nights to given me fifty reasons he shouldn't sleep in his bed.  What goes on when my children are away from me with family, has to be okay with me, right?   It's help and it costs zilch!

Tonight we've taken on visitation rights with my seven year old son's cat, Sammy.  Sammy lives with Grandmother, but is going to be traveling to our house at night and returning the following morning.  This idea was my bright one to help my oldest son sleep in his own bed at night.  Have I mentioned I don't like cats?  Sammy has been hanging out on the deck when he needs to do his business, and in the house the rest of the time. Of COURSE his favorite room in the house would be my room and bathroom.  I've been so patient thus far, but we are less than one night into cat visitation!   This is quite an adjustment, but I'll do near anything to ensure both of my sweeties sleep all night and in their own beds!

Last week I had a bad day and a wonderful friend of mine delivered an angel.  Literally!  God knows when it's needed, and I needed it that day.  I firmly believe that he speaks and works through others. 

I believe that God closes doors and opens bigger, better doors for a reason.  I have a strong faith in God.  I never "found God," I just opened my eyes and took a long look around.  God has opened the best doors for me at the right time (which is his time, not mine), and for that I am blessed beyond comprehension & forever grateful for the little things in life that I used to take for granted.

Lately, I've been ultra patient with my sweeties.  The seventeen month old is in teething hell.  That's no understatement.  I have a goose egg on my forehead if you don't take my word for it!  I love him so much & my heart hurts for him that he's in pain.  My head also hurts from the lack of sleep, but I've bought some vitamins and hopefully that will help me take off like a rocket ship! 

Tomorrow night is a night at church for all the women and lots of my friends are attending.  I'm ecstatic!  I've never heard her speak, but I used to read her blogs.  After I knew she was locked into coming, I stopped reading her blogs so that I would know nothing she might speak on.  I feel led to go, so I'm going and I've invited all my friends.  Saturday will be mission work at a women's prison.  I don't know what it entails other than giving up a Saturday and eight hours spent in a large facility with felons.  I can't wait!
I hope you are all having a relaxing Monday!  I'll tell you, if you want to relax, do NOT take your sweeties grocery shopping and hopping solo!  I promise!  My sweetie dumped a whole bag of gold fish in a small community grocery on purpose!  What can you do?  I just smiled and told an associate that my son had dumped his goldfish and we were sorry.  He didn't make a big deal of it, but my patience were wearing thin after the "eerios (cheerios)" were purposely thrown out of the cart as well!  The doctors wonder why I have high blood pressure (this is a new thing that's less than two years old).  I can't think of ONE reason I would have anything but normal blood pressure!  I KNOW that I eat healthy so I'm sure cholesterol isn't the issue.  Either way, I sucked up my hate for maintenance medications and I take the blood pressure pill at night. 

I hope you are all shining with your winning smiles and personalities, giving every ounce of love you can give to those you cherish most.  I've been two one visitation this week and would have been to more if babysitting weren't an issue.

When opportunity knocks, answer the door!  Many new and exciting opportunities have come my way lately.  I'm so blessed!  I can't wait to share them with you!  I'm beyond thrilled about them all!  I'm so excited & it's been a LONG time since I've been this excited!  Great things are happening!

 Take care of yourselves and be the light, strength, and hope that others see.  You may be the only role model and God that others see.  Keep that in mind and notice an attitude change.  You are all wonderful people to me and I think you are all doing a phenomenal job!  Keep up the hard work.  God answers prayers and is still in the miracle business! Make it a GREAT week!  Remember:  "Don't sweat the small stuff & it's all small stuff."